Becoming Very Close to Jesus
I'm simply being as diligent as I can with my soul with the motivation of being very close to Christ.
When I began my modern monastic journey, I set a simple goal for myself: I aimed to spend a certain amount of time with the Lord each and every day. At first, I aimed to spend around two hours per day in prayer and meditation. I gradually increased the goal over the next several months until I started aiming for about four hours per day. At the beginning, this was actually a helpful strategy. It gave me a lot of motivation because I was aiming for something big and if I met it (which I regularly did), it would feel awesome.
These days, however, I've shifted my goal to better align with my true values and intentions. My goal isn't anymore to spend a certain amount of time with the Lord each day. Just because I've spent hours with the Lord doesn't necessarily translate to having a quality relationship with God. Amount of time can be one factor, but it's not the only factor and it's certainly not the most important. I now understand that the ultimate goal of spirituality is to become very close to Jesus. Spiritual disciplines and exercises are simply aids to help me connect deeply with Christ in my quest to become very close to Him. It has become my real goal to get as close to Jesus as possible here on earth and to do whatever is within my capacity to achieve that. That includes deep and robust times of prayer, meditation, and other spiritual exercises. I've discovered that this is an even more powerful motivation for spending deep times with God: deep friendship with God and access to His power for my life through the Holy Spirit.
In the book of Deuteronomy, Moses told the Israelites to "keep [their souls] diligently" (Deut. 4:9 ESV). The time that I spend doing spiritual exercises each day helps me to be "diligent" with my soul. They provide vital opportunities for me to draw near to God and become very close to Him. It just so happens that it takes a good amount of time each and every day to be diligent with my soul and my relationship with Christ. That's how I end up at about three to four hours of prayer and meditation each day. I'm simply being as diligent as I can with my soul with the motivation of being very close to Christ.
Aiming for a certain amount of time with the Lord each day can help you jumpstart your spiritual journey. I know it helped me get started and motivated. But at some point, you may want to consider shifting your motivation as the real reason for your spiritual journey isn't just to achieve a certain number of hours of spiritual exercise per day but to actually become really close to Christ. And if you are diligent with your soul and your times with God, then the hours will just naturally come. You won't need to force it.
Barnabas the Monastic
Servant of Christ. Husband. Dad. Modern Monastic. I have a wild ambition in life: get as close to the Lord Jesus Christ as I can while on earth. I explore and integrate ancient Christian monk wisdom in modern everyday life. Lives in Canada.
